Innocent 

2. A simple, guileless, inexperienced, or unsophisticated person.

I’ve always been called innocent. It didn’t really bother me (it did just a little because yes I was inexperienced, but I wasn’t simple and guileless you feel?).

But it really started to bother me earlier this year. This girl, Jada, would call me that all the time. She’d laugh give me a side hug, lay her head on mine, and say, “Aw Hannah, you’re so cute and innocent.” I knew I was that way, but she made me feel like it was bad, and I knew it wasn’t. She was afraid to talk to me about certain things because of my innocence. David too! (The dude I dated for a week). It bothered me so much that I tried to be less innocent. I already swore and had a dirty mind, so I started cursing even more and saying lots of dirty jokes. But they still saw me as this cute little girl. I began to wear crop tops and show cleavage, I felt uncomfortable doing that, but I did it anyway. I just became this different person. But I was still cute and innocent in their eyes. After David broke up with me, I just stopped caring and did me. I was wondering why I cared so much.

I’m losing my pointtttt. What’s my point?? 

💡oh yeah!!

It’s weird though, ever since I had my first and second kiss I don’t feel innocent anymore. Kissing isn’t even a big deal, but I don’t know. I feel grown and sexy….and I don’t like it.

I don’t care to not be innocent anymore, but I’m trying to understand Jada and David’s definition of it. Do I have to do drugs, party, and have sex to be experienced? I’m really trying to understand this? 

Yeahhh I don’t remember my point…whatever

I’m just going to keep doing me, I’m not going to try to be someone I’m not to prove myself to other people. Nah. I’m so glad high school is over.

Advertisements

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s